We’re social creatures. Relationships are a significant element in our lives. In fact, most things we do on a day to day basis involve other people. It is an important part of life. So you can understand why we care about others. But what if we care too much? What if we are worrying consistently what others think of us?
It can lead to feelings of inadequacy, anxiety and overwhelm; constantly thinking of another and what they may or may not think. Usually, it serves no purpose at all. People will have their thoughts and opinions. They are entitled to them just as you are to yours. The issue here lies with giving all the power to another person. You are looking to them for validation, for acceptance, for completeness. You are responsible for completing you, for making you happy and validated.
Take this example of a job interview. It’s quite common to feel nervous at an interview, wanting the interviewer to like you, to accept you and as such, give you the job. However, this is actually your career, you will do the daily grind and do business for them. We get so focused on worrying about them liking us it’s easy to forget to consider ourselves. Is this for me? Do I like them, their ethos, their prospects? The power has been handed totally to the interviewer willing them to like you, willing them to hire you. When really how you view yourself is just as important.
Other people are important to us, of course, they are. It would be unwise to completely disregard them and their opinions. But I’m highlighting YOU in the process of gaining acceptance. Accept yourself, acknowledge yourself and value your opinion of you. Take back some of your own power. Other people’s opinions of you don’t define you. It’s just an opinion. Ask yourself the facts. Only you walk in your shoes. So…only you know the answer.
If you would like to get in touch and talk more about how I can support you with self-acceptance, please get in touch.